This is Money Blog

My blog of shame

It’s been a while since I last scribed a blog, early January to be exact, whereupon I wrote candidly about my addiction to fags and my New Year’s attempt to banish them from my life altogether.

But here I am, five months on since I quit the filthy cigs. A day at the Allen Carr clinic and all my fag related problems were solved – and here’s the bit where I am meant to wax lyrical about how proud and relieved I am that not a single cigarette has passed my lips since.

But alas the shameful reality of the situation is that, although I quit five months ago, I re-united with the tabs some four months ago, sorry, four and a half months ago. (See there’s a reason I haven’t blogged in a while, namely shame. Admission of failure is never easy, just ask the Government.) I managed a paltry two weeks – yep, a mere 14 days.

I know for those out there (the sensible lucky ones) who have never smoked at all, this could seem pathetic, and yes it is, but smokers, past and present, will hopefully have some sympathy…maybe. Okay, that may be asking a lot from the ex-smokers.

Notably, following my rapid return to a life of fag-ash my esteemed colleague Richard Browning prompted a call for my dismissal in light of my failure - a little harsh methinks. 

Of course, I am far from proud of my failure, anything but - and with the price of fags rising at a velocity similar to that of oil, I feel rather foolish and devoid of all willpower. Even though the Allen Carr method of dropping fags in theory doesn’t involve the stuff, but I have my doubts.

I believe I recently paid circa £6.40 for a packet of menthol dipped ciggies - madness. But I just cannot seem to divorce myself from them.

I have tried willpower – failed. I have read Allen Carr’s Easyway to Stop Smoking book, three, if not four times, it worked once, on the first occasion for four months – I can’t even remember what inspired my fall from the wagon.

And of course, I have had a trip to the Allen Carr day clinic in South-West London, which inspired me for a mere two weeks. And I am still infatuated with my filter-tipped ‘friends’.

One ex-smoker chum has recommended hypnosis, it worked for her, but then again Allen Carr has apparently worked for millions. This is the last time I will bring up the fag debate, at least for now, or until I can actually write something along the lines of ‘yep, I am actually off the fags for five months,’ but that feels like a long way off, so I’ll have to occupy myself with other topics in the meantime.

But have I given up, giving up? Well no I haven’t and one day I really do hope to be fag-free but as Mark Twain once quipped: ‘Quitting is easy, I've done it a thousand times.’

Phil Scott, This is Money

My Smoking Ban

New Year resolutions are boring - and quitting smoking may be the most hackneyed of them but it is still not quite as bad as the whole giving up drink for the month of January tomfoolery.

Ergo I am happy to say that in 2008 it is the former cliché I have opted for - yes I have decided to kick the filthy weed, once and for all…once again.

I have pretty much been a committed smoker since the age of 17, or 23 if my parents are reading, sure there have been moments of madness before and I have tried to jettison the filter tipped buddies from my life but for the most part my junkie ways have meant me sucking on at least 20 a day, or 30, okay 40 if a night out is thrown into the mix for as long as I can remember.

Now while that’s doing my health (skin, clothes, general aura etc) no good, it’s the dent in my wallet that causes me the most discomfort – let’s face it if the shock tactics and health scares actually had any impact at all, no one would ever spark up. But over the past year I have set alight more than £3,200 worth of Marlboro Menthols, according to the This is Money smoking calculator, yes that was menthols.

But let’s face it - it’s not exactly perceived as a glamorous pastime these days, is it? Cool? Definitely not. In fact lighting up, either indoors or out, doesn’t exactly inspire rounds of applause, in fact in some cases it could make you feel about as welcome as Boy George at a KKK rally.

So last week I decided enough was enough and shelved out another £220 in the name of cigarettes or rather in a bid to knock them on the head to the Allen Carr ‘Easyway’ to quit smoking clinic.

For the uninitiated, Carr’s world-famous ‘Easyway’ asserts that the ‘relief’ smokers feel on lighting a cigarette, the feeling of being ‘back to normal’, is the feeling experienced by non-smokers all the time.

Using a combination of psychotherapy and hypnotherapy (as well as the ‘I’ve just spent £220 so it had better work’ motivation factor), the method works in the opposite way to the ‘willpower method’. It does not concentrate on the reasons the smoker should not smoke: the money, the slavery, the health risks - all that jazz we already know. But instead it focuses on why smokers continue to smoke in spite of the obvious disadvantages.

Sir Richard Branson and Sir Anthony Hopkins are just two of the clinic’s alumni. Sir Anthony gushes: ‘I found it not only easy but unbelievably enjoyable.’

Now did I feel an utter revelation following my five plus hours of rehab on a Saturday afternoon in south west London? Well, no…not exactly but by the same token I haven’t smoked since then (and that’s very good for me) and although I wouldn’t mind a coffee and cheeky Marlboro right now, I am just not going to indulge that ‘little monster’ which I created when I lit up that first cigarette – it would just seem pointless. I think. Maybe.

My friend and co-rehabilitee Francesca, is going through a ‘thank god I never have to smoke again’ phase ever since we left the clinic but then again she can exaggerate…but am I just being sceptical or was I just not listening properly?

I can’t say at this point whether I will never smoke again, but I know I won’t today…does that count? Bets please as to when you think this quitter will cave...

Phil Scott, This is Money