My blog of shame
It’s been a while since I last scribed a blog, early January to be exact, whereupon I wrote candidly about my addiction to fags and my New Year’s attempt to banish them from my life altogether.
But here I am, five months on since I quit the filthy cigs. A day at the Allen Carr clinic and all my fag related problems were solved – and here’s the bit where I am meant to wax lyrical about how proud and relieved I am that not a single cigarette has passed my lips since.
But alas the shameful reality of the situation is that, although I quit five months ago, I re-united with the tabs some four months ago, sorry, four and a half months ago. (See there’s a reason I haven’t blogged in a while, namely shame. Admission of failure is never easy, just ask the Government.) I managed a paltry two weeks – yep, a mere 14 days.
I know for those out there (the sensible lucky ones) who have never smoked at
all, this could seem pathetic, and yes it is, but smokers, past and present, will hopefully have some sympathy…maybe. Okay, that may be asking a lot from the ex-smokers.
Notably, following my rapid return to a life of fag-ash my esteemed colleague Richard Browning prompted a call for my dismissal in light of my failure - a little harsh methinks.
Of course, I am far from proud of my failure, anything but - and with the price of fags rising at a velocity similar to that of oil, I feel rather foolish and devoid of all willpower. Even though the Allen Carr method of dropping fags in theory doesn’t involve the stuff, but I have my doubts.
I believe I recently paid circa £6.40 for a packet of menthol dipped ciggies - madness. But I just cannot seem to divorce myself from them.
I have tried willpower – failed. I have read Allen Carr’s Easyway to Stop Smoking book, three, if not four times, it worked once, on the first occasion for four months – I can’t even remember what inspired my fall from the wagon.
And of course, I have had a trip to the Allen Carr day clinic in South-West London, which inspired me for a mere two weeks. And I am still infatuated with my filter-tipped ‘friends’.
One ex-smoker chum has recommended hypnosis, it worked for her, but then again Allen Carr has apparently worked for millions. This is the last time I will bring up the fag debate, at least for now, or until I can actually write something along the lines of ‘yep, I am actually off the fags for five months,’ but that feels like a long way off, so I’ll have to occupy myself with other topics in the meantime.
But have I given up, giving up? Well no I haven’t and one day I really do hope to be fag-free but as Mark Twain once quipped: ‘Quitting is easy, I've done it a thousand times.’

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